2017 Winter Premiere Predictions

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With a new year comes new distractions. Wonderful, wonderful distractions. And though some of you may have set your sights on resolving your procrastination issues this year, I’m here to completely ruin that for you by sharing some theories and predictions for 2017’s ultra-distracting winter/spring season returns. What are New Year’s resolutions for anyway? (Nothing. Nothing at all).

This Is Us, a new favorite of mine, premieres the second half of its first season tonight, promising to answer the big question that’s been torturing the entire fan base for a month; is Toby going to die? If there’s one thing worth noting, it’s the December finale’s continuing assertion that “nothing bad happens on Christmas Eve”; we see that theme play out during Kate’s flashback appendectomy as well as Dr. Katowsky’s life-or-death hemorrhage operation. However, I see this as the perfect opportunity to shock the viewers with a sudden death. Toby very well could die tonight; in fact, I’m almost sure he will (if he doesn’t, I’ll finally bite the bullet and sing at Donald’s Inauguration). Besides Toby’s impending doom, there’s also the mystery surrounding Jack’s (the dad portrayed by Milo Ventimiglia) death. What we do know: he died “a long time ago” according to Kate (Chrissy Metz); long enough for Randall’s (Sterling K. Brown) daughters not to know who he is. We also know that Jack was still alive during his children’s high school years, as seen on the football episode. But when and how could he have possibly died?

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My bets are on something alcohol related; after all, we did receive some foreshadowing at the beginning of the series about a possible alcoholism issue. I also have no idea how to feel about Miguel marrying Rebecca (Mandy Moore) after Jack’s death (I don’t care. Kevin shouldn’t have given him the Pilgrim Rick hat.)

How To Get Away With Murder will return next Thursday, picking up right after Wes’s death reveal. We’ve got plenty of questions to ask, starting with why Nate was sent to identify Wes’s body and eventually touching on whether Bonnie is going to go ahead and die already. But first, why not theorize about the identity of Laurel’s baby daddy? I original prophesized that whoever was found dead in Annalise’s house would more than likely be the father of Laurel’s baby. However, after overthinking things a little, I’ve decided that the father must be Rob Kardashian. Either him or Frank.

Anyway, there definitely has to be something fishy about the fact that Annalise tried to gather her ducklings together right after Wes went to rat at the Police station. And the fact that Nate followed them into the house and escaped without a scrape on him is even worse. I’d hate to believe it, but Annalise could have very well planned all this for a greater purpose. Her grief upon seeing dead Wes could have been an act and whatever was on the phone she gave to Oliver could have proven that. Also, the fact that Bonnie is still breathing reminds me that in the HTGAWM universe, there’s just a lot of disappointing sh*t happening.

Though it won’t make its reappearance until March, Once Upon A Time has its share of questions to be answered, such as “do fairytale characters watch cable television?” and “did Storybrooke vote for Jill Stein?”. But there are also more important questions surrounding the fate of Emma and Regina now that they’re trapped in the fake Enchanted Forest. It’s my guess that fake Robin Hood will eventually end up helping the girls find their way home, but Regina might try to stay in the dream…in fact, Emma might let her? That’s an ending to Regina’s story that I wouldn’t exactly be angry with. However, I will be angry if Belle and Rumple’s son, Morpheus, doesn’t have a good enough reason for trying to kill Emma in that black cloak (it was him she was seeing in her shaking fits this season). We know he probably turned to the darkness after being left in the care of the Black Fairy (Rumple’s mother. Who knew he was mixed? I sure didn’t). Rumpelstiltskin isn’t mixed.

Last to be mentioned and farthest away from its premiere is season 7 of American Horror Story. While showrunner Ryan Murphy has announced that the season’s theme will be revealed before its first episode (unlike AHS: Roanoke), I’m pretty stumped about what that theme might be. Apparently, we can expect to see a few characters from AHS: Freak Show (hopefully not thrown in like Lana Winters during Roanoke).

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Have any predictions, yourself? Leave them in the comments and we can start 2017 the right way; plagued by distractions and preoccupied by cheap entertainment.    

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Donovan Banks

Writer of many things. Television Enthusiast. Food cookeruper/eateruper.

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